IT'S FRIDAY!!!

Take full control of your weekend! Enjoy! :)

The Power to Choose

When we fail to recognize our ability to take control of your life, we fall into a pattern of "life sucks", "why them and not me?", "I will never get this done" or "I will never be able to achieve [fill in blank]". Do you realize how much these thoughts weigh you down and turn you into a helpless/hopeless victim lacking the ability to take responsibility for your present and your future?

It's not easy taking yourself out of victim-mode, especially if you have lived a significant amount of your life this way. But. if you don't make the decision to act now, all you are doing is fueling the continued cycle of helplessness. When you phrase your actions/decisions in this manner, you remove self-imposed pressures and stresses that you associate with the task.

Making a point to incorporate choice into my daily life has shown me strength, courage and discipline that I used to think never existed nor was it possible to manifest. As you will recognize below, life can be a series of trade-offs and your choices serve as a catalyst for positive or negative results in the near or distant future. Remove words like "I can't", "I have to" and "I should (or shouldn't)" from your vocabulary. They hold you back more than you may think. Instead, replace them with affirming statements such as the ones below that I use for myself:

• I choose happy thoughts.
• I choose to make time for exercise in order to live a more healthy lifestyle and reduce my risk of illness/injury in the future.
• I choose to not let other's opinions of me or my work affect my self-worth.
• I choose to focus on my work (or I choose to surf the web instead).
• I choose to forgive others. In forgiving others, I release the unnecessary burden of pain that I previously chose to cling to.
• I choose to pay that bill (or I choose to not pay the bill and accept the priviledge of paying late while incurring late fees). 
• Given the choice of chocolate or vanilla, I pick vanilla. Why? Not just because of the taste, but because that is what I choose to pick.

Phrasing your actions/decisions in this manner help you to remove self-imposed pressures and stresses that you associate with the task. Life then becomes a more empowering experience with endless possibilities.

If you are not sure where to begin to take control of your life, I figured I would give you a little jump-start. There is a book I am recently read (and am re-reading!) called The Now Habit that speaks in depth on the topic as it relates to procrastination. It helped me realize a lot of things I am speaking of in this blog today. There's also a powerful story on this topic that popped up on the Tiny Buddha yesterday. There is a plethora of other resources you can turn to for help on taking charge of your life...books, magazines, blogs, seminars...if its something you really want, you just have to make the choice to get up and look for them ;).

My Favorite Things #3

Orchids : )

360- Degree Journaling

While visiting one of many blogs I follow, I came across a unique and interesting method of realizing my potential through 360-Degree Journaling. I found the exercise pretty fun and would love to share with you what I came up with. It seems like something that has the power to help you recognize your accomplishments and bring motivation into your life:

East (3 ideas, urges, callings, opportunities that arise):

1.  Membership in the Urban Gateways New Arts Forum for young professionals.
2. The ability to make a difference in the lives of others through volunteering, event planning and blogging.
3. Newfound desire to get my jewelry site up and running for business.

West (3 things now ending in my life):

1. Accepting the past for what it is...the past.
2. Forgiving myself and rebuilding connections with friends and family.
3. Ending the fear of taking control of my life and my future.

North (3 things that stabilize me):

1. Mindfulness meditation
2. Balancing social interactions with relaxation time.
3. Exercising self-love (long hot baths, home mani/pedis, walks along the lake, etc.)

South (3 things that evoke spontaneity, creativity and spirituality):

1. TinyBuddha.com
2. Working on my jewelry designs.
3. Spending time with my unique, wonderful friends : )

I would love to know what you were able to come up with for yourself in this exercise!

On Being Mindful

What does it mean to be mindful?

Mindfulness is an ancient Buddhist concept that when utilized helps bring you to a more present and aware state of being. It is a very powerful form of meditation which encourages you to intentionally live in the present and to remove all judgment; to consciously be aware of all the processes it takes to perform a task, to eat a meal, to feel an emotion, etc.  It has been proven to bring relief to various health issues such as stress, chronic pain and illness (See How Meditation Can Make You Happier). Mindfulness meditation is a very important part of my life. Without mindfulness, I wouldn't have been able to overcome the anxieties and irrational fears I was plagued with for a significant part of my budding adulthood.

After spending the last two years diving into the world of mindfulness, I have come to develop my own meaning for mindfulness based on my personal experiences. To me, being mindful has come to mean:

• Having a good relationship with yourself. Caring for your physical health, mental health and maintaining a reasonable level of self-esteem while also being strong enough to experience humility.
• Being aware and accepting of others, despite any shortcomings you believe they may have.
• Taking your time and practicing patience. Not being so eager to rush through the days tasks.
• Determining the root of your fears and challenging them with rationality.
• Allowing flexibility in your life. Things rarely ever stay the same. The events and surroundings before you change from moment to moment. Making yourself aware of this helps prepare you for the next moment while allowing you to recognize and appreciate the past for what it truly was and the present for what it really is.
• Treating every experience as a learning experience.

The definition of mindfulness will be similar or different depending on your experience. But one thing is for sure: once you get in the habit of practicing mindfulness, you begin to realize how much of your life you have been truly living in the dark.

If you are interested in learning more about mindfulness. I recommend you read more from a very well-known (and my favorite!) teacher on the subject, Jon Kabat-Zinn. He is the Director of the Stress Reduction Clinic and the Center for Mindfulness in Medicine, Health Care, and Society at the University of Massachusetts Medical School. He has also written many books on the topic of mindfulness.

Today's Horoscope

My Horoscope Today from DailyOM
 
Decisive Evolvement
Sagittarius Daily Horoscope
You may feel friendly and approachable today and find that others are attracted by your charm. You may also feel outgoing and want to establish a larger network of friends and associates. This extroverted mind-set can help attract lucrative opportunities to expand your life circumstances, both professionally and personally. You may wish to give some thought to the aspects of your life you wish to expand upon today, and then come up with some simple action steps to help attract opportunities to grow. By making your intentions clear and your actions decisive, there are no limits to what you can create in your life. You could introduce yourself to someone new to expand your circle of friends, apply for a new job to expand your professional growth, or explore learning opportunities to expand your realm of knowledge.

Taking action on our desire to improve or expand our life circumstances will attract more opportunities to grow and evolve on emotional, spiritual, and professional levels. We can take full advantage of our outgoing mind-set by using it to attract lucrative opportunities into our lives. By setting an intention and then taking action toward a specific goal, we put powerful energy into motion that attracts opportunities to stretch our limits beyond what we thought was possible. The more decisive our actions, the more lucrative the outcomes we will experience. Our lives then become a journey of evolvement that results in greater meaning and fulfillment. By channeling your extroverted mood into decisive actions today, you can create many opportunities to expand your life circumstances. 
 

It's Dance Your Pants Off Monday!

Happy Monday!

So Why Uniquewonderfulme?

Back in college I received a birthday card for my 22nd birthday from someone special. On the front of the card was a balding, distressed-looking ostrich and inside it said, "Happy Birthday! Unique, Wonderful, You!"

Upon first glance at the card I was taken aback. I wondered to myself, "why would you get someone something like that?"

I was aware of how different I was. I didn't have the "typical" feminine personality that was expected of me. Nor did I have the typical personality that was expected of my age range. And I definitely didn't have the "typical" personality that was expected of my ethnicity either (I was often told by my peers I was "not black enough" or "not hispanic enough" for my opinions to matter. That I was just an "Oreo"). And my humor at times can be a little off-the-wall. I was really good at throwing people for a loop. Consequently, my "uniqueness" was met my whole life with questions, judgments. I had a large range of acquaintances, but I was never able to feel a sense of true "belonging" within social groups (and boy did I jump from group-to-group!).

My insecurity at the time prevented me from seeing the card for what it truly meant. I thought it meant there was something odd, wrong about me. As much as I new rationally the card meant well, deep down I was having feelings parallel to those I had felt all my life: that I wasn't appreciated and that I was being made fun of. And the negative thought toward it never left my mind. 

As I have gotten older, I have realized that "belonging" was never anything I really wanted deep down anyway. Had I truly wanted to belong, I would have made the necessary adjustments in my life to do so. Instead, the things that people found odd about me, I learned to embrace. It was what made me the knowledgable, diverse, engaging and culturally sensitive person that I am today. People fascinate me. And I am more drawn now to those that are not afraid to deviate from the norm every now and then. Those that embrace that which is unique about them. It inspires me. It motivates me to keep being me no matter what others think. Had I followed any norm, I would not have had the wonderful experiences in my lifetime that I have thus far.

And since I have learned to embrace my "uniqueness", I have never felt so free. It's like a weight has been lifted off of my shoulders. And I now choose to welcome into my life only those who are willing to accept "uniquewonderfulme" for who I am. Nothing less will be tolerated nor should it!

My Favorite Things #2

My beautiful cat Churchmouse (aka Churchie!)

My adorable nephew Jack (aka Jack-e-poo!)

My Favorite Things :)

CUPCAKES<3

(This one is courtesy of Crumbs! Yummy!)

IT'S FRIDAY!!!

Make sure by the end of your day you have at least 3 of the following things readily available:

1. A fun song to get you home after a long week of work.
2. A good friend on speed dial.
3. An ice-cold, frosty beer (or cocktail) waiting for you. 
4. A flavorful cup of tea.
5. A cozy chair.
6. A hot bath.
7. A night on the town.
8. A good movie.
9. A captivating book.
10. A 30 minute walk (or run).
11. Some cozy slippers.
12. Some playtime with your pet.
13. 30 minutes to work on a craft/hobby you like.
14. A delicious dinner .
15. A sweet treat.

HAPPY FRIDAY!

Dog Days Are Over

As I continue to work on this blog, I find I want to share with you one of my theme songs of the year.

I am one of many who choose to interpret this song as a celebration. We all have difficult times, or "dog days". At some point, you can either choose to keep running from your problems, or face them head on and learn conquer them before they conquer you.

In my recent past, I have been dealt many hurdles and struggled to push through and survive. This year, I have decided running was no longer an option if I wanted to be happy. I have chosen many times to face my fears dead on. Consequently, I feel my mind and my heart have opened up and I now I am starting to see what I am truly capable of doing and capable of having within my life.

We owe it to ourselves and our happiness to stop running. To stop evading and to just walk right through whatever struggles you face. In walking through them, you find strength you thought you never had.

And when we reach a point where we feel we have gotten over the hump, it is only logical and necessary that we jump up and celebrate and show others what is possible!

Add A Little Sugar To Your Day

The world today is very much hustle and bustle. People are constantly moving from point A to point B and never really stopping to think about what it was that got them there in the first place; Never really taking time to pay attention to their true surroundings and their effects on their daily lives only to come home tired and thinking about the new responsibilities of tormorrow.

Now, in doing this, it may almost be instinctive to turn to the negative aspects of the day, but in the fast-paced, chaotic and demanding lives that many of us lead, how often do we allow ourselves to find time to sit back, unwind, and appreciate the little things in life that help make us who we are and get us through the day?

It's important that we find time, even if it's 5 minutes, to recognize the things in our day that help us feel good, even if for a moment. With enough practice, you will hopefully begin to find that your mood naturally shifts to a more positive state. The more positive the outlook, the more eager, willing and capable of facing the challenges of the day you become; and hopefully the good moments will start to outweigh those that are daunting.

To set an example, here is a reflection of things that have gotten me through my day thus far:

• I woke up to my cat purring with love.
• I managed to get some recreational reading time in on my commute to work and during lunch.
• Despite running a bit late, I was able to make it to work on-time without consequences.
• I read some inspirational blog posts.
• I shared some helpful information with a few friends in need.
• I had a nice cup of hot tea during work.
• I engaged in a few light-hearted conversations with co-workers.
• I satisfied my sweet-tooth with a delicious mini-cupcake.
• I am taking the time right now to share my experiences with you in hopes they will motivate you to do the same :)

Can you think of anything in your day that made you feel good?

Let the Good Times Roll!

Welcome to the launch of my first blog! 

The years have come and gone…youth, friends, family, learning, development, adventure, love, loss and spiritual journeys.

Life is ever-changing and never dull. You and you alone have the power to create the life you want and to make it the most exciting and enlightening experience possible!

This blog will be an constant work in progress incorporating my life experiences, reflections and interesting things I have found on the web or received from others.  I am excited to see how this site will evolve over time and I hope you will find it both uplifting and of use in your own journey. Enjoy!